Wild Swans - Tanka (Haiku style poem) - irony

Today's #afewwordsaday #KAFWAD submission

Why not join me? Today's prompts are below. Prompts for the rest of the week are in a separate post just below.

12th September 2015

What do you think of my Tanka poems? It's my first attempt. Can you do better?

Opposite: the King's wife was beautiful on the outside but when he looked at her he was filled with horror.

Prompts / date	12th September 2015
FMS Photo a day	opposite
Text type	Tanka
Sentence type	Irony
Story	The Wild Swans

Irony	overstates how good or bad something is, rest of sentence reveals overstated word to be false. Our 'luxury' room turned out to be a farm building. The 'trip of our dreams' was, in fact, our worst nightmare.
Tanka	5-7-5-7-7 last two lines change pace or tone

The Six Swans

The king had six sons

His wife turned them into swans

Their sister saved them

She knitted shirts from nettles

and turned them back into men

So this one doesn’t change the tone or pace, let’s try again with a bit more help from Alan Peat's '50 ways to re-tell a story':

I was a sad girl.

My six brothers were now swans.

I had to save them:

For six years I could not speak

And knitted six nettle shirts.

Better – but no irony…

Six boys and one girl.

one step mum and a cruel spell:

Six swans and one girl.

Six years of knitting nettles.

Six brothers back: just one wing.

Hmm, still no irony. Let’s try just part of the story…

A king, lost, no hope.

An old woman can help him

If he weds her girl.

This ‘worthy and pretty’ girl

Filled our king’s heart with horror.

Help - The Clever Little Tailor

Today's #afewwordsaday #KAFWAD submission

Why not join me? Today's prompts are below. Prompts for the rest of the week are in a separate post just below.

8th September 2015

Prompts
FMS Photo a day	Help
Text type	Film script
Sentence type	Some, other
Story	The Clever Little Tailor

Film script	A film script is like a play script but should be:  written in 12pt courier, names are in capitals; scene headings, slug line Slug line has 3 parts: setting, interior (INT) or exterior (EXT) location, time of day (morning, dusk etc) Film scripts don't tell emotion of character - focus is on what can be seen.
Some, other	This type of sentence makes comparisons, two clauses separated by a semi colon.

I’m just doing a small part of the story today:

EXT. A FOREST – DAY

TITLE: THE CLEVER LITTLE TAILOR

FADE FROM BLACK

We see the little tailor wearing a girdle with the words ‘Seven in one blow’ embroidered on it; and the giant standing in the forest. A huge oak tree is lying on the ground near them.

                          GIANT

      Now we will see if you are able to carry anything properly.

             (He takes the little tailor to the mighty oak tree)

If you are strong enough, help me to carry the tree out of the forest.

                          THE TAILOR

             (With gusto)

      Readily!

             (Now commanding.)

Take you the trunk on your shoulders, and I will raise up the branches and twigs; after all, they are the heaviest.

The giant takes the trunk on his shoulder, the tailor seats himself on a branch. The GIANT cannot look round and carries the whole tree and the LITTLE TAILOR into the bargain: THE LITTLE TAILOR is clearly merry and happy.

                          THE LITTLE TAILOR

             (Whistling the tune: ’Three tailors rode forth from the gate,’)

      The giant, is visibly exhausted from dragging the heavy tree, stops.

                          GIANT

Hark you, I shall have to let the tree fall!’

The tailor springs nimbly down and seizes the tree with both arms as if he had been carrying it.

                          THE LITTLE TAILOR

             (Mocking)

Some think you are a great fellow, others will now know you cannot even carry a tree!

THE LITTLE TAILOR and the GIANT continue through the forest.

FADE TO BLACK